Author: Avery Lombardi, MSc | Reviewed by: Dr. Rebecca Fernandez, MBBS
People with ADHD often struggle with people-pleasing behaviors, driven by impulsivity, emotional dysregulation, and a desire to avoid rejection or conflict. According to NHS guidance, these tendencies can lead to saying “yes” too often, neglecting personal needs, and feeling overwhelmed or burnt out.
Why people-pleasing happens in ADHD
ADHD symptoms, such as difficulty setting boundaries and emotional reactivity, can cause individuals to overcompensate by seeking external validation. A PubMed study confirms that people with ADHD often internalize rejection sensitivity, leading to a fear of saying “no” and inadvertently overextending themselves.
Evidence-based strategies to stop people-pleasing
NICE guideline NG87 suggests Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) as an effective way to address negative thought patterns and improve boundary-setting. Assertiveness training, mindfulness, and emotional regulation techniques also help individuals with ADHD develop healthier communication and self-compassion practices.
Joining ADHD support groups or seeking professional therapy can further reduce isolation and build confidence. ADHD Certify provides assessments and support to help individuals challenge people-pleasing behaviors and improve their self-assertiveness skills.
Key takeaway
Stopping people-pleasing behaviors in ADHD is possible with the right tools and support. By practicing assertiveness, emotional regulation, and self-compassion, individuals with ADHD can improve their relationships and emotional wellbeing.
Avery Lombardi, MSc
Author
Avery Lombardi is a clinical psychologist with a Master’s in Clinical Psychology and a Bachelor’s in Psychology. She has professional experience in psychological assessment, evidence-based therapy, and research, working with both child and adult populations. Avery has provided clinical services in hospital, educational, and community settings, delivering interventions such as CBT, DBT, and tailored treatment plans for conditions including anxiety, depression, and developmental disorders. She has also contributed to research on self-stigma, self-esteem, and medication adherence in psychotic patients, and has created educational content on ADHD, treatment options, and daily coping strategies.
All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the author's privacy.
Dr. Rebecca Fernandez, MBBS
Reviewer
Dr. Rebecca Fernandez is a UK-trained physician with an MBBS and experience in general surgery, cardiology, internal medicine, gynecology, intensive care, and emergency medicine. She has managed critically ill patients, stabilised acute trauma cases, and provided comprehensive inpatient and outpatient care. In psychiatry, Dr. Fernandez has worked with psychotic, mood, anxiety, and substance use disorders, applying evidence-based approaches such as CBT, ACT, and mindfulness-based therapies. Her skills span patient assessment, treatment planning, and the integration of digital health solutions to support mental well-being.
All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the reviewer's privacy.
