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How can I improve my empathy with ADHD? 

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Updated
ByMy Patient Advice
Author: Victoria Rowe, MSc | Reviewed by: Dr. Rebecca Fernandez, MBBS

Many adults with ADHD describe feeling emotions more intensely, a trait that can make empathy both powerful and challenging. According to a 2023 scoping review in the Journal of Attention Disorders, emotional dysregulation is a core feature of adult ADHD, not a side effect. It can lead to strong reactions and difficulty calming down after stress, which in turn affects social understanding and empathy. 

Discover if you have ADHD

Why empathy can feel harder with ADHD 

Empathy relies on being able to pause, process, and interpret what someone else is feeling. Studies in Frontiers in Psychiatry have found that adults with ADHD often struggle to inhibit emotional impulses or shift focus in the moment, making it harder to take another person’s perspective before reacting (Walter et al., 2023). 

A 2023 qualitative study described how rejection sensitivity and intense emotional responses can make people “read” criticism where none was intended, increasing defensiveness or withdrawal. These experiences can undermine empathic listening, even when the intention is good. 

Building empathy through self-awareness and skills 

According to NICE guideline NG87, adults with ADHD benefit from structured psychological support, including CBT-style and psychoeducational approaches that target emotional regulation and social understanding. A 2022 review in Frontiers in Psychology found that coaching, CBT, and psychoeducation can improve emotional control, organisation, and relationship skills, especially when partners or peers are involved in learning. 

Mindfulness-based therapies can also help. A pilot study in the Journal of Attention Disorders found that mindfulness-based cognitive therapy improved self-compassion and emotional awareness, helping adults respond with more patience and perspective in social situations. 

Everyday empathy in practice 

NHS-aligned self-help guides such as Leicestershire Partnership NHS’s Making Sense of Adult ADHD and Berkshire Healthcare’s ADHD and Relationships leaflet suggest practical ways to grow empathy: 

  • Schedule calm, low-distraction moments for important conversations. 
  • Practise active listening and check understanding before responding. 
  • Reflect on emotions with curiosity rather than judgement. 
  • Use reminders or journaling to notice triggers and patterns in communication. 

Supportive programmes such as Theara Change are also exploring coaching methods to help adults with ADHD develop emotional insight and interpersonal confidence. 

Reassuring takeaway 

Empathy is not something people with ADHD lack; it is often something they feel too deeply. The goal is to learn how to regulate that emotional intensity, so understanding can lead the way. According to NICE and RCPsych guidance, with self-awareness, structured support, and consistent practice, empathy can become one of ADHD’s greatest strengths. 

Victoria Rowe, MSc
Author

Victoria Rowe is a health psychologist with a Master’s in Health Psychology and a BS in Applied Psychology. She has experience as a school psychologist, conducting behavioural assessments, developing individualized education plans (IEPs), and supporting children’s mental health. Dr. Rowe has contributed to peer-reviewed research on mental health, including studies on anxiety disorders and the impact of COVID-19 on healthcare systems. Skilled in SPSS, Minitab, and academic writing, she is committed to advancing psychological knowledge and promoting well-being through evidence-based practice.

All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the author's privacy. 

Dr. Rebecca Fernandez, MBBS
Reviewer

Dr. Rebecca Fernandez is a UK-trained physician with an MBBS and experience in general surgery, cardiology, internal medicine, gynecology, intensive care, and emergency medicine. She has managed critically ill patients, stabilised acute trauma cases, and provided comprehensive inpatient and outpatient care. In psychiatry, Dr. Fernandez has worked with psychotic, mood, anxiety, and substance use disorders, applying evidence-based approaches such as CBT, ACT, and mindfulness-based therapies. Her skills span patient assessment, treatment planning, and the integration of digital health solutions to support mental well-being.

All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the reviewer's privacy. 

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