How do teacher remarks affect my identity later? 

The words of teachers often stay with us far longer than we realise. For many people with ADHD, early classroom comments “You’re not trying hard enough,” or “You can do better if you just focus” can become deeply internalised. According to The Lancet Psychiatry, negative teacher labels can influence a child’s developing sense of self, sometimes leading to perfectionism, shame, or a lifelong belief that they are “difficult” or “lazy.” 

How teacher feedback shapes long-term self-perception 

A 2025 PubMed review found that repeated criticism and misunderstanding from educators are among the strongest predictors of self-esteem loss and emotional dysregulation in ADHD (PubMed). These experiences don’t just affect school performance they shape identity, creating emotional patterns that may carry into adult life. Conversely, when teachers use encouragement and validation, they help children build resilience and a stronger sense of self-worth. 

NICE guidance (NG87) highlights the need for whole-school approaches to ADHD support, encouraging positive communication and collaboration between families, teachers, and healthcare professionals. UK organisations such as Mind UK and the ADHD Foundation stress that praise, autonomy, and consistent empathy are key to preventing identity harm. 

For adults reflecting on past experiences, professional ADHD services such as ADHD Certify offer assessments and clinician-led reviews that explore the emotional impact of schooling and support healthier self-understanding. 

Key takeaway 

Teacher remarks can shape far more than academic outcomes they influence how we see ourselves. If you grew up feeling defined by criticism, remember that those words reflected misunderstanding, not truth. With compassion, therapy, and self-awareness, it’s possible to replace old labels with a more accurate, confident sense of who you are. 

Avery Lombardi, MSc

Author

Avery Lombardi is a clinical psychologist with a Master’s in Clinical Psychology and a Bachelor’s in Psychology. She has professional experience in psychological assessment, evidence-based therapy, and research, working with both child and adult populations. Avery has provided clinical services in hospital, educational, and community settings, delivering interventions such as CBT, DBT, and tailored treatment plans for conditions including anxiety, depression, and developmental disorders. She has also contributed to research on self-stigma, self-esteem, and medication adherence in psychotic patients, and has created educational content on ADHD, treatment options, and daily coping strategies.

All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the author's privacy. 

Dr. Rebecca Fernandez, MBBS

Reviewer

Dr. Rebecca Fernandez is a UK-trained physician with an MBBS and experience in general surgery, cardiology, internal medicine, gynecology, intensive care, and emergency medicine. She has managed critically ill patients, stabilised acute trauma cases, and provided comprehensive inpatient and outpatient care. In psychiatry, Dr. Fernandez has worked with psychotic, mood, anxiety, and substance use disorders, applying evidence-based approaches such as CBT, ACT, and mindfulness-based therapies. Her skills span patient assessment, treatment planning, and the integration of digital health solutions to support mental well-being.

All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the reviewer's privacy.