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Why do people with ADHD forget important commitments like meetings? 

Posted
Updated
ByMy Patient Advice
Author: Phoebe Carter, MSc | Reviewed by: Dr. Rebecca Fernandez, MBBS

If you have ADHD, missing meetings or forgetting key commitments can be incredibly frustrating, especially when you genuinely meant to remember. According to NICE guidance (NG87), this isn’t a sign of carelessness. It’s linked to how ADHD affects memory, attention, and time awareness. 

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The science behind forgetfulness 

Research shows that ADHD involves differences in executive function, the brain’s system for planning, prioritising, and remembering to act. The Royal College of Psychiatrists notes that these skills depend on working memory (holding short-term information) and prospective memory (remembering to do something in the future). When these systems are overloaded or disrupted, it becomes easy to forget even high-stakes events like team meetings or appointments. 

People with ADHD also experience time blindness; a weaker internal sense of how time passes. This can make future obligations feel abstract or far away until the last minute, when urgency spikes and anxiety sets in. As NHS experts explain, distractibility, emotional stress, or rapid task-switching can all disrupt recall, especially in busy work or social settings. 

How to make commitments easier to remember 

The NHS ADHD Taskforce (2025) and NICE recommend using external tools to support the brain’s internal systems. Strategies include: 

  • Digital reminders: layered phone or smartwatch alerts (for example, 24 hours and 15 minutes before). 
  • Visual planners: whiteboards, paper calendars, or sticky notes placed in visible spots. 
  • Structured routines: checking your schedule at the same time daily (e.g., after breakfast). 
  • Coaching or CBT: to build accountability and practical time-management habits. 

Medication can also help by improving attention and working memory, but the best results come from combining it with behavioural supports and environmental structure. 

Reframing “forgetfulness” 

Forgetting important commitments isn’t a character flaw, it’s part of how ADHD affects the brain’s time and memory systems. The good news, as NICE and NHS guidance emphasise, is that small, consistent supports can make a big difference. Coaching models such as Theara Change help people translate these strategies into daily life, supporting long-term reliability and confidence. 

The takeaway 

Missing meetings or forgetting obligations is common with ADHD, but it’s manageable. External reminders, structured habits, and coaching can bridge the memory gaps ADHD creates, turning chaos into consistency. With the right systems in place, people can rely less on memory alone and more on a supportive, sustainable structure that works with their brain, not against it. 

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Phoebe Carter, MSc
Author

Phoebe Carter is a clinical psychologist with a Master’s in Clinical Psychology and a Bachelor’s in Applied Psychology. She has experience working with both children and adults, conducting psychological assessments, developing individualized treatment plans, and delivering evidence-based therapies. Phoebe specialises in neurodevelopmental conditions such as autism spectrum disorder (ASD), ADHD, and learning disabilities, as well as mood, anxiety, psychotic, and personality disorders. She is skilled in CBT, behaviour modification, ABA, and motivational interviewing, and is dedicated to providing compassionate, evidence-based mental health care to individuals of all ages.

All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the author's privacy. 

Dr. Rebecca Fernandez, MBBS
Reviewer

Dr. Rebecca Fernandez is a UK-trained physician with an MBBS and experience in general surgery, cardiology, internal medicine, gynecology, intensive care, and emergency medicine. She has managed critically ill patients, stabilised acute trauma cases, and provided comprehensive inpatient and outpatient care. In psychiatry, Dr. Fernandez has worked with psychotic, mood, anxiety, and substance use disorders, applying evidence-based approaches such as CBT, ACT, and mindfulness-based therapies. Her skills span patient assessment, treatment planning, and the integration of digital health solutions to support mental well-being.

All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the reviewer's privacy. 

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