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Can ADHD lead to codependency in relationships? 

PostedSeptember 30, 2025
UpdatedSeptember 30, 2025
ByMy Patient Advice

ADHD codependency can develop when emotional needs, impulsivity, and low self-esteem lead one partner to rely heavily on the other for validation, structure, or emotional regulation. This is not due to a lack of love or commitment but often stems from underlying challenges with boundaries, consistency, and self-trust. 

Many people with ADHD feel misunderstood or insecure in relationships. This can fuel emotional dependence on a partner who offers support or stability. While support is important, an over-reliance may lead to unhealthy attachments that prevent personal growth or equality in the relationship. 

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How It Affects Relationship Balance 

Excessive reassurance seeking 

Someone with ADHD codependency may constantly ask for validation, fearing they are a burden or not enough. 

Difficulty making independent decisions 

Struggles with attention and confidence can cause one partner to defer entirely to the other, leading to relationship imbalance. 

Neglecting personal needs 

In trying to keep the relationship stable, the person with ADHD may ignore their own goals, interests, or wellbeing. 

Recognising signs of ADHD codependency is a step towards healthier dynamics. With boundaries, self-reflection, and support, individuals can build stronger, more balanced relationships that encourage growth for both partners. 

Visit providers like ADHD Certify for personal consultations and expert advice tailored to your needs.    

For a deeper dive into the science, diagnosis, and full treatment landscape, read our complete guide to Social Relationships.

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Harriet Winslow, BSc - My patient advice author - mypatientadvice.co.uk

Harriet Winslow, BSc

Author

Harriet Winslow is a clinical psychologist with a Bachelor’s in Clinical Psychology and extensive experience in behaviour therapy and developmental disorders. She has worked with children and adolescents with ADHD, autism spectrum disorder (ASD), learning disabilities, and behavioural challenges, providing individual and group therapy using evidence-based approaches such as CBT and DBT. Dr. Winslow has developed and implemented personalised treatment plans, conducted formal and informal assessments, and delivered crisis intervention for clients in need of urgent mental health care. Her expertise spans assessment, treatment planning, and behavioural intervention for both neurodevelopmental and mental health conditions.

All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the author's privacy.

Dr. Rebecca Fernandez, MBBS, author and a reviewer for my patient advice - mypatientadvice.co.uk

Dr. Rebecca Fernandez, MBBS

Reviewer

Dr. Rebecca Fernandez is a UK-trained physician with an MBBS and experience in general surgery, cardiology, internal medicine, gynecology, intensive care, and emergency medicine. She has managed critically ill patients, stabilised acute trauma cases, and provided comprehensive inpatient and outpatient care. In psychiatry, Dr. Fernandez has worked with psychotic, mood, anxiety, and substance use disorders, applying evidence-based approaches such as CBT, ACT, and mindfulness-based therapies. Her skills span patient assessment, treatment planning, and the integration of digital health solutions to support mental well-being.

All qualifications and professional experience stated above are authentic and verified by our editorial team. However, pseudonym and image likeness are used to protect the reviewer's privacy. 

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