How are nonverbal cues processed in relationships involving autism? 

According to NHS guidance, autism or autism spectrum disorder (ASD) affects how people interpret social and emotional information, including nonverbal cues such as facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language. These cues, which often come naturally to non-autistic individuals, can be confusing or overwhelming for autistic people. 

According to NICE guidance (CG142), these differences are part of the brain’s unique processing of social information, not a lack of interest or empathy. 

Understanding nonverbal communication in autism 

Autistic people may rely more on words and context than on subtle cues. A partner’s change in tone or facial expression might not automatically signal emotion without a clear explanation. The World Health Organization (WHO) notes that these differences reflect variations in how social meaning is processed, often involving heightened focus on detail rather than emotional inference. 

A 2025 study in the Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders found that autistic adults often use logical reasoning rather than intuition to interpret nonverbal behaviour, which can make emotional communication in relationships more effortful but not less genuine. 

How this affects relationships 

In relationships, misunderstandings can occur when one partner assumes that emotional signals will be recognised automatically. For example, an autistic person may miss cues of irritation or sadness if they aren’t stated directly. Likewise, non-autistic partners may misread calmness or limited facial expression as disinterest. 

According to NHS advice on communication and interaction, openly discussing emotional cues such as saying “I’m upset” instead of expecting it to be noticed helps reduce conflict and anxiety. Clarity benefits both partners, creating emotional safety and mutual trust. 

Supporting better understanding 

According to NICE guidance (CG170), structured communication strategies can bridge gaps in nonverbal understanding. These may include: 

• Using clear verbal descriptions of feelings or intentions. 

• Checking in gently (“Did you notice I’m feeling tense?”). 

• Agreeing on shared signals or cues for comfort, stress, or space. 

• Allowing processing time before expecting an emotional response. 

Such approaches build confidence and connection, helping autistic and non-autistic partners interpret each other with empathy rather than assumption. 

Takeaway:  

Autistic people may process nonverbal cues differently, but not less meaningfully. When communication becomes explicit, patient, and curious, relationships grow stronger through understanding rather than guesswork.